I’ve recently written an article for Estilo Tendances about how to be happy. One of the rules I included in my guide to happiness was ‘surrounding yourself by those who mean the most’. By ‘those’ I mean the people whose sole purpose, as your friend, is to not only look out for you but do what’s best for you. Now, I’m not talking about someone who runs after you at every call, but those people who unconsciously treasure your friendship and not only encourage you but also motivate you in all your pursuits. Be sure to remove any toxic personality types of people that might harm you.
Negativity is the number one factor in diminishing happiness, so one thing is for sure, you need to eliminate it. When you hang around with the same people all the time, you can become blind to who is good for you and who is not, so it’s time to re-evaluate. By no means am I intending to influence or change the way you look at who you consider your nearest and dearest, but instead, encouraging you to realign YOUR focus on doing what is best for YOU. Be the best you can be, be unstoppable.
Toxic Personality Types
So, when I googled the definition for “toxic”, time after time, the word “poison” came up. Now, we all know that the purpose of poison is to ruin what is good, however rarely take the chance to sit back and realise that quite often that good can be YOU.
You are your own person and it’s time to look after yourself and follow your road to success, just make sure those who join you on your way are genuine. I’m sure that by providing someone with love and friendship you would inevitably expect this to be reciprocated. Well, now it’s time to make sure it is.
#1. The Haters
Among the toxic personality types, you can find the haters. As Taylor Swift would say, ‘the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate’. These are people who are quite often jealous. Perhaps it’s something so trivial as you looking flawless in your drop dead gorgeous ensemble or something a little more major, such as getting your dream job.
These people always have something to say and quite often that “something to say” is far from positive. Surround yourself with people who compliment and congratulate you.
#2. The Shamers
Some people enjoy putting others down. Instead of letting people put you down or even worse, retaliating, put a stop to it by walking away. Ignorance truly is bliss. Shamers often put other people down in order to feel good about themselves, but this is unnecessary and quite frankly not ok.
Always put your opinion first. If you think those pair of shoes make your pins look amazing, wear them. There is a difference between positive critique and envy.
#3. The Manipulative
Manipulative people are in a power battle of their own. They often feel as though they need to be more powerful than you. They struggle to attain success. However, we are not discussing success on a larger scale, but something on a daily basis. Maybe you are receiving a lot more attention than another person and, instead, they respond by trying to tell you what to do, how to dress or how to act in order to make themselves look better.
This is, perhaps, one of the most difficult toxic personality types to eliminate from your life as you can often be blinded by their actions. Whilst working for themselves, they try to make it appear as though their actions are bettering you when sometimes their intentions are cruel.
#4. The Wannabes
My favourite example of toxic personality types is the wannabes, which can be demonstrated through Facebook and Instagram liking. If you like something like it, rather than refrain from doing so, because you have already liked someone’s post in the past week and you wouldn’t want to look too keen.
These are the people whereby as soon as someone they consider ‘better’ comes along they will drop you in an instance as they adore the new found attention they receive. If you sat back and looked at this from an outside perspective, you would be disgusted in what you saw. Quite often, in this situation, the true values of friendship are undermined and, instead, a hierarchy and the lust for inclusion take the centre stage.
#5. The Selfish
Selfish people quite simply work for themselves and no other. They, too, have toxic personality types which should be avoided. The actions they take favour them and no one else. Friendship is supposed to have group values where you pursue actions that are best for each other.
It almost aligns itself with those we would be considered manipulative, however, are much harder to track as these personalities almost become innate to everyday life and, therefore, you never know of anything else.
#6. The Judgemental
Ok, so judging people makes the world go around in a bittersweet way. Whilst we need people to provide judgements on many serious issues in the world when it comes those who you surround yourself with, you need people to be impartial instead of instantly critical.
How are you ever supposed to ask for an opinion, if you are unsure of your actions when someone’s mind is already made up? An example of this is when you are too afraid to ask for an opinion because you already know what someone would say. Ask yourself: would you ever like someone avoiding you for the same reason?
#7. The Gossips
So, everyone loves a little gossip amongst themselves, however, gossiping about one another and furthermore extending this to others, is never ok. There is something different between a few comments amongst friends and the spreading hurtful news.
Gossiping isn’t always bad, sometimes we genuinely just desire to find out the latest news, however, this is where things can often turn quite bitchy and perceptions change. Be trusting of who you surround yourself with.
This entire topic is one of taboo. Many are afraid to pinpoint these people so, instead, I have provided an insight of actions. Whilst some may show some of these traits, these are part of the many different types of personalities that make up this world and that’s ok. When it’s not ok is when someone is putting YOU down and making you feel powerless. You are your own person so it’s time to surround yourself with positive people who encourage you to flourish and strive for success.
Source: pixabay.com, pexels.com